Tag Archives: toddlers

Preschool Playdate: Truck Day

We have several little boys that attend our playdates.  I thought it would be fun to incorporate a theme that really spoke to them.  It was equal opportunity play: the little girls enjoyed this playdate as much as the boys!

Our day started as usual:

— Welcome song in English (emphasizes printed name recognition as Sweet Peas find their card in a line-up and place it on our Name Ledge)
— Welcome song in Spanish (reinforces names as Sweet Peas sing to their peers)
— Discussion of theme
— Storytime
— Unsquiggle activity
— Poem/Song before we break for Centers

STORYTIME
TRUCKS by .The fact we have been collecting toys for ten years proved helpful in bringing this book to life.  For every vehicle pictured in the book, we had an example for the Sweet Peas to experience with their eyes and their hands.  Otter and Charger enjoyed taking turns passing them around to our guests.

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LITERACY
Inspired by an idea in The Mailbox SuperBook to use a plane and a cloud to talk about position words, I worked with an idea to make that activity fit Truck Day.  I found line drawings of a dump truck and boulders online, added eyes to the truck to animate it a little, and printed out a list of direction and position words for parents to use with their Sweet Peas as they did this activity.  You can read the instructions in the photo.  I added the section about switching roles with your Sweet Pea because I find that our own kiddos have so much fun being in the teacher role.  Added bonus: on top of their enjoyment, it reinforces the concept they just learned!

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MATH
This was an activity of my own creation.  I wanted to incorporate play with the trucks, so I came up with a shape sorting station.  I used Microsoft Word to create pages of shapes; then we laminated them and cut them out.

The Sweet Peas would take a handful of shapes out of the bucket, sort them with their parents, and then put them in the truck and deliver them to the right station.  Puma and I taped up extra shapes onto the front of our Name Ledge with the idea of making them look like buildings along a city skyline.  I don’t know if the Sweet Peas made that connection; whether they did or not, we had fun creating this math activity to fit our theme.

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DISCOVERY
A variation on the always popular Sink/Float activity.  This time, we used plastic boats and all manner of wheeled vehicles to see which ones would sink or float.

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ARTS&CRAFTS ~ Make & Take
This was an activity out of The Mailbox SuperBook that I have been wanting to do since Puma was a preschooler.  For whatever reason (mostly because I couldn’t justify the mess!) it took designating a Truck Day to make it happen.  The kiddos used different color paints and textures on the wheels to “drive” an artwork onto their paper.

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IMAGINATIVE PLAY
This play station incorporated lots of different ideas: literacy in sign identification, math in counting and sorting, and lots of play and imagination as the Sweet Peas laid out the road way, used the “car wash” and learned how to cooperate with their peers so that they could all play with the city scene together.  It was such a big hit that we kept bringing out the “City Box” in subsequent play dates.

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Tales from the Toddler Side: Tantrums

We have had a rough Spring as parents. Daddy Bruss and I have parented three children already; we’re thinking we have this parenting thing figured out…and along came Otter.  She is growing us again – literally since her Birth-Day we have had to be willing to learn other ways, because very little of what worked with our other children is working with her.

Her huge tantrums this Spring all started with a transition in our home.  We switched around the use of some rooms in our home, and she got her own room.  She was totally unsettled and she could not understand how she had her own room, and was still welcome in our room (we co-sleep). Moving her clothes out of our closet and into hers, and her toy box from our room to her room; those were especially challenging.

While transitioning, the hallways and the normally empty spaces are stacked high with boxes.  This was totally foreign to Otter – she is the type of kiddos that likes her structure.  This was a total mess within the walls of her safe place.

On top of that, there was a weekend when I was gone most of the day for a training workshop.  And if that wasn’t enough, her Daddy flew out and was gone for four days, one of which overlapped with the time I was gone.

Cue meltdown.  And another one. And another one after that.  At the height of tantrum season, she was having 2-4 meltdowns a day. We had a good six week stretch where we had some pretty long and interesting days.  “Struggle” is an understatement.  I felt like the worst mom in the world.  Almost everyday, I wondered how I going to keep it together when 25 pounds of toddler was breaking me down at every turn – nothing I did, or didn’t do, seemed to abate the tears and the tantrums.

It was pretty brutal.  She was hurting herself, and lashing out at me with pinching fingers and hitting hands.  The depth of our emotions surprised me.  I knew I loved my child, and then again, I felt such resentment for the places we were going emotionally.

I have worked so hard to find my Peaceful Mama and keep Crazy Mama at bay. It was **really** hard to take those deep breaths on the days when Crazy Toddler showed up instead of my sweet baby girl.

I struggled between giving in to her demands to stop the self-harm, and shutting myself down because I could not handle it anymore.  Truth be told, it was hard on all of us. There were days when the other Sweet Pea kids acted out because they saw that meltdowns got my attention and were a priority. It was akin to that metaphor of putting out fires and never getting ahead.

There was one particular moment that stands out in that whole stretch of time.  A little frame: at the same time that we are going through all this emotion as a family, I am also doing some work on identifying archetypal voices for a class I am taking. Out of the blue,during one of the interactions with Otter when she is hitting me, this message comes through to me loud and clear, “When you hit me, I feel like you don’t love me.”

BAM. Lightening moment. I fell to the floor in tears, realizing that my reaction to her hitting is coming from a deep place of feeling rejected and unloved as a child.

For the record, I was a child in an era when spanking was the accepted form of discipline, and I wasn’t abused.  It simply was the mainstream way to do things, and in all other ways I knew I was loved.  We always had a caring home environment, food, clothing, and lots of affection otherwise.

Recognizing what was being triggered inside of me as Otter was hitting me was a turning point. In my Adult, I can reason with the Child statement and write a new story: “My parents love me, they did the best with what they knew.  My child loves me, she is acting out of a place of feeling powerless-fear-hurt-anxiety-insert feeling here.”  Knowing and being able to inner-dialogue worked really well to shut down Crazy Mama when the hitting started, and bring in Peaceful Mama right from the start.

We are on the other side of this rough patch now, and that is such a relief.  We survived because first of all, Daddy Bruss came through in a big way and acted as the fire extinguisher when things got out of hand.  No matter the time of day, he would pop out of his home office and help bring the volume level down. We were also a united front – we both gave Otter the message that self-harm was not acceptable, and that we loved her too much to let her hurt herself.

I also got a much needed “day off” to reflect on what was happening, why it was happening, and what I could do as the mother, the nurturer, to help get our family through this season of tantrums.  Here are some of the things that came into focus that day:

  1. I took the time to think about each child’s love language, and wrote down ideas on how I could meet fill their love tank on a daily basis.
  2. I took to heart Dr. Laura’s advice that we are our child’s “North Star”.  When you have four children, finding time to interact with each one intentionally takes, well, intention. So I created a system to keep track of whose turn it is to get ‘private time” with Mommy and Daddy.  Then, actually using the system – that has been *huge*.
  3. I wrote down what I expected from myself as the mother, where I was conflicted, and some steps to bridge the gaps between wanting to be a guide for our children, and actually being the guide I know I can be for them.
  4. I committed to bringing back (for myself) more of the structure that I crave. If I start the day on my schedule, then I feel on top of my game, which in turn affects how I feel about my abilities, positively impacts my emotions, etc., and that facilitates a day with Peaceful Mama at the helm.
  5. I decided that we were only going to work together in our homeschool for 25 minute stretches at a time.  This gave all of us a break from each other, and we also found that there was more fun in each day.  It has worked so well, that this is going to be the standard for our homeschool days going forward.

The good news is that we are all still in one piece, and things are much better “for now”.  Here are some resources that helped me focus on what Otter needed from me as she was struggling through all the emotions she was feeling:

Dr. Harvey Karp
http://www.happiestbaby.com/learn-about-your-baby-toddler/faqs/#tht

Dr. Laura Markham
http://www.ahaparenting.com/blog/angry-child-triggers-parent-control-self
http://www.ahaparenting.com/ages-stages/toddlers/toddler-tantrums

MindBodyGreen
http://www.mindbodygreen.com/0-18351/5-kid-friendly-yoga-poses-to-help-your-child-avoid-a-meltdown.html

Quote from Charlotte Mason
“Every day, children need something to love, something to do, and something to think about.”

How about you? Which ideas or words of wisdom have helped you survive a toddler tantrum?

Review: Preschool for Threes by AOP

We are two weeks into our homeschool year.  I am loving our new preschool program – so much that I wanted to share it with you!!

Note: I have not been compensated by AOP for the following review, and I am not in any way affiliated with anyone or anything that is linked in the post.  Feel free to click away on the links!  Nothing is going into my pocket!!
I am sharing out of joy and excitement in the hopes that another family can benefit from this product.

We used the Horizon Preschool program for when our two older kiddos were 4 & 2 and loved it.  They released a new program last year that was too young for Charger, so he also used the Horizon Preschool curriculum.  This year, Otter is turning three, so we had a perfect candidate to take advantage of the new Preschool for Three’s program.

According to the Children’s Health Network, “a normal attention span is 3 to 5 minutes per year of a child’s age”.  If we can keep Otter’s attention on a task for nine minutes, we call it a win.  

Why I love Preschool for Threes: 

    • Otter has a chance to “do school” without being overwhelmed.
    • She has a reader that is just for her.
    • She practices school readiness skills every day.
    • She is introduced to one letter concept and one number concept a week, and the worksheets provide an opportunity to reinforce both.
    • The worksheets have delightful animals that carry through the theme every week.

She is so proud to be able to sit at the school table with her older siblings, and believe it or not, they want to do her work, too.  They *love* her animal coloring pages and cannot believe that I do not have enough worksheets to go around for them to color their own animal.  We are talking a nine-, seven- and five-year-old here.  I guess my only complaint is that I have to get on-line to find them line drawings of animals to color so they don’t feel left out!!

Here is what you get with the program…along with my insight about why there is so much to love about the Preschool for Threes program:

Curriculum: Horizon Preschool for Threes by Alpha Omega Publishing

Curriculum: Horizon Preschool for Threes by Alpha Omega Publishing

Teacher’s Manual:
Every week is themed around one bible lesson.  The lesson plan offers a supply checklist plus additional activities to supplement the worksheets and the theme.  I like having a checkbox, and we also start reasoning skills at the preschool level, so I created a spreadsheet that I can fill in for the week ahead on Sunday night, and then check off throughout the week.  I get all of the supplemental material ready so all I have to do on the weekday is pull out a packet for that day, all ready to go.  Total prep time on Sunday night: 1 hour.

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Teacher’s Manual – Horizon Preschool for Threes by Alpha Omega Publishing

Student Workbook:
These are the worksheets for the program.  You can tear them out as needed, or if you have other children to prep for, do it all at once and lay it out for the week.  Horizon has the best illustrations and colors – as I said earlier, our older kiddos pine for pages like these although they are way beyond 3-year-old work.

Student Workbook - Horizon Preschool for Threes by Alpha Omega Publishing

Student Workbook – Horizon Preschool for Threes by Alpha Omega Publishing

Student Workbook Companion:
These pages are printed on heavier weight paper.  They consist of games and activities that can be played throughout the school year.  So far we have prepared a lacing card, a language arts aid, and now we have a memory game for next week.  I am pasting them on card stock to make them last even longer, and as soon as I have a working laminator again, they will be laminated.  I write the lesson theme on the back or the container so that I can remember to reinforce it as the school year stretches on and the themes aren’t at the tip of my tongue.

Since the language arts aid for this week was a child’s face, we have been talking about the vocabulary for different parts of the face in English and In Spanish.  The theme of the week was “Sin” from the fall of the the garden of Eden.  As we go forward to use this aid, we will use the song O Be Careful, Little Eyes to reinforce the vocabulary as well as the lesson.

I am thrilled to be able to fill a preschool box for Otter of just her own activities.  At any point going forward in the school year, she can entertain herself with sturdy materials that can be used over and over.

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Student Workbook Companion – Horizon Preschool for Threes by Alpha Omega Publishing

Bible Story Reader:
This is by far Otter’s favorite part of the program.  She is delighted to have her very own book since we have bookshelves full of books for each of our other children’s school programs.  She proudly pulls down her “God book” every day.  We are not just reading the story for the week.  The illustrations are fantastic, so as she finds an illustration that appeals to her, I “read” her the story.  Not always the whole thing, maybe a sentence or two, or I ask her what she sees in the picture.  As you may have noticed in some of the photos, although we are only two weeks into the program, the book is already well-loved.  I have admonished all our other children to keep things well-taken care of since they have to be used four times over, and we don’t want Otter to get dog-eared hand-me-downs.  This is going to be Otter’s very own book so I am patient in letting it be loved.

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In practice:
All in all, I do “school” with her and Charger (5yo) for about an hour a day.  She sits at the table to do her worksheet and her other supplemental activity, then I lose her for a little bit while she goes to play and I work with Charger, and then she comes back and we do the other supplemental activity for the day and/or re-play an activity she liked.  We usually come back in the afternoon to finish whatever we didn’t cover in the morning, or do more re-play as well.

This program is just so perfect for a three year old, it seems like it was written by other three year olds for their peers to enjoy.  Thank goodness that there are educational experts who have studied child development…I have a strong suspicion that they were consulted on this program.

Horizon has exceeded my expectations with this program.  I have always enjoyed their colorful pages and activities.  This is about to become my favorite Horizon program, and I am only going to get to use it once!  At least we are going to get to use it and love it well for the next nine months – I can’t wait to see how our littlest Sweet Pea blossoms with this program.

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One week of print materials – Horizon Preschool for Threes by Alpha Omega Publishing

 

Tuesday Tips: A Weaning Story // 26 months

Mine & T’s breastfeeding journey has been very rocky from the start with low lows, some highs, a lot of tears but a ton of joy and gratefulness too. I have wrote about breastfeeding before here and here and over the past 14 months (since my son’s first birthday) my thoughts about nursing, nursing at night, and weaning have been all over the map.

he has been nursing to sleep and cuddling his boobs for literally years now!

he has been nursing to sleep and cuddling his boobs for literally years now!

My son turned two in March, as of January he was nursing all day AND all night, today as I write this (May 15th) he is nursing at nap time only, once to fall asleep and sometimes once more if he wakes prematurely. These past couple months have been *nothing* like I could have ever imagined so I thought I would share our weaning story, for anyone who feels like their toddler will never “self wean”, anyone frustrated with the amount and/or duration of their toddler nursing, anyone who feels like the end will never come, or even those just curious as to what could lie ahead!

In January we tackled night weaning.
We were following T’s cues, many times when he would wake I would go in and cuddle him and he would fall back asleep. I knew he was capable and it would yield much better sleep for both of us. It was rough though. He would usually settle for cuddles until about 1-3AM and then he was INSISTENT on getting milk. I explained over and over not until the sun, but days and weeks, a month passed and he was still asking. We would get out of bed, get water, get snacks, there were some veerrryyyyy long nights in there but we stuck to it, we had taken this step because we were all ready and we were not going back. He still sleeps in our bed, so we were always there with him, cuddling, singing, patting his back, he would often ask me to bounce him on the ball but I wanted to help him sleep on his own, not substitute nursing for bouncing. Often in order to calm down a walk around the house was necessary and then we would climb back in bed for cuddling and maybe a song.

In April T contracted a mild case of Hand, Foot, Mouth Syndrome. He had a fever one afternoon and through the night so he was nursing TONS. We watched movies, slept, and nursed.

the 2,739th viewing of Frozen (;

the 2,739th viewing of Frozen (;

I made an exception and nursed him through the night during his fever and the next night to help him sleep as he was obviously very uncomfortable. I knew it would be hard going back, T is a very all or nothing kind of guy, and although the next couple of nights were difficult, the nights after that were much improved!

Our last nursing session for the night was usually lying down next to each other where T would drift off to sleep while still on the breast, but a few nights in a row he started growing restless, popping on and off, and eventually I would just say no more milk and he would roll over, cuddle into me and fall asleep. I took this as a sign that he was ready to give up nursing to sleep. Not only could he fall asleep without it, but it seemed the limit would actually really help him. From there we started doing bath time, diaper, pajamas, nurse in bed sitting up with the lights on, then read lots of books, have some water and/or snack and then turn white noise on and lights off to cuddle and go to sleep. T picks up on routines a lot more now and his memory never ceases to amaze me. Because we were doing something new I knew it was important to really start being more “routine” and sticking to the same thing night after night in the same order. We have always been kind of all over the place during the evening but it was a very natural shift for all of us to be more disciplined as it seemed beneficial for T and helpful for all of us to avoid melt downs, super extended bed times, frustrations, etc. We are by no means strict or anything, just follow the same flow each night around the same time. This was surprisingly easy, as I said, he was definitely ready. There was hardly any protest and he would normally make it until around 5AM until asking for milk, which is when we would nurse for the first time that new day.

On May 1st T had his 5AM nursing and was incredibly restless afterwards, nursing was not putting him back to sleep and was up, out of bed and ready for the day before 6AM. This was very UN-typical for him as he would usually like to lay around in bed nursing and sleeping on and off until 8:30, sometimes even 9AM! I took it as a great opportunity, I had been wanting to cut down nursing to 5AM, nap time, and before bed for awhile but he was just nursing SO often during the day it seemed like an impossible feat. Something clicked that morning and I just knew I had to try. I wish I had more to add, but really, it just came out of no where that today, was the day.

We don’t do the “big boy” thing in our house and it’s not something I will continue with but for this instance I talked up “big boy milk” in the morning and told him that we were going to go to the coffee shop where he could get some in a cup that was just for big kids. I knew we had to get out of the house, and fast, before he got bored or wanted my attention and asked and then had a tantrum to nurse. This day and the next day were not easy. He would still ask for milk at home (we had stopped nursing in public a long time ago) but I stuck to the 5AM, nap time and bed time only. I would offer almond milk, cow’s milk, to make chocolate/strawberry/banana milk in the blender or make a smoothie. There were tantrums and meltdowns but I tried to stay as busy as possible and keep us out of the house from the morning until nap time and then leave the house after nap for an activity before coming home for dinner. My husband came home at 4PM the first day and took T (as he usually does on Tuesdays & Thursdays) for an activity outside of the house just them two. This was extremely helpful! The next evening we headed out of the house and then played outside for a long while. I had to give T all of my attention, if I became the least bit distracted (by my phone or a conversation) or was trying to do something that didn’t involve him (makeup, laundry, etc) he would ask for milk and it would be a lot harder on both of us.

After two days he was totally fine! He would still ask for milk but I would just say “you have your water over here”, or “want some almond milk?” or just laugh and say “noooo noo milk!” and he would just smile and run off. I honestly was surprised at how easy it was. We have tried to decrease frequency and duration in the past and it was always met with unparalleled perseverance, uncontrollable crying/tantrums and a huge disconnect between us. This time he was obviously ready and it showed, it seemed he just needed the nudge. He would fall or get hurt and cry in my arms and I would offer him water in his straw cup and he would accept, a few days in he had a fall, came to me in tears for a big hug then got down and went and got his water cup himself! Tears gone and he was ready to play more! This was extreme initiation to me, he was so old and independent and practicing amazing self regulation right before my eyes!

The Night Time Nursing

After a few days his night time nursing session was literally 30 seconds long on each side, and seemed like the perfect feeding to cut out next. I tried saying no milk one night and he was pretty upset so I was happy to continue. Two nights later though he wasn’t even asking and late into the routine he asked once and I just said “you already had your milk!” and he didn’t even protest and just like that the nighttime feeding was gone.

The Early Morning Nursing

He seemed to be waking earlier and earlier in the AM wanting milk, 5AM, then 4:45AM, then 4:40AM so although I knew it was going to be rough on us I decided to nix this one ASAP. We went to bed each night armed with almond milk + a little maple syrup in a straw cup, water, a banana and a cheese stick next to the bed. Whenever he would wake, middle of the night, early morning, I would first rub his back and cuddle, if that didn’t console him then I would offer water or almond milk then offer snacks.

The mornings are still rough and he is upset because he doesn’t actually want to be awake that early but can’t put himself back to sleep, but he doesn’t insist on milk and totally “gets” that it is not an option and the choices that he does have. We have naturally transitioned into continuing to lay in bed that early but reading his favorite stories. After a couple of weeks he has even fallen back asleep after the dreaded 5:30/6AM waking until 7AM a few times!

Nap time Nursing 

So that just leaves us with the last nursing time of the day, nap time. I am not ready to give up his naps. Although he *could* go a day without napping, he can’t go several days in a row without a nap considering his early rising times now. He also has never fallen asleep in bed for nap without nursing. I use naps to work, nap myself, or just take some time in the middle of the day to recharge, as I often feel like I am running on crazy. Some friends that have weaned rely on a car ride around 1 or 2PM to put their little one to sleep but since we car share with my husband this isn’t an option for us. He has fallen asleep in the stroller before but usually not until 3PM when he is just wiped out, which is really late for a nap and doesn’t really help me if I am out and about pushing the stroller. I am not really sure what we are going to do about this last feeding…. I am not in a complete hurry to end it but also don’t want us to get to a point where he is absolutely unable to nap without nursing and naps go out the window entirely when nursing does. I feel like we may have a small window of time where it could still be possible?

I know this has been all over the place but I just wanted to get our entire story and process out in one place! This transition really has been everything I could have hoped for, easy, pleasant, and seriously feels liberating for everyone! T has such an easier time sleeping now, if he falls asleep in the car he can be transferred to bed (that has never! happened without nursing before), he has a more reasonable bed time and naturally evolved schedule that works well for us and he doesn’t have the super cranky episodes for times in which I am unable to provide nursing. We read more books and cuddle more and I don’t feel a bit of sadness or regret or any negative emotions at all for that matter, only positive! I am so very grateful and thankful to have nursed him this long, through fevers and diarrhea, through bumps and bruises and countless bedtimes and nap times and uncomfortable situations and so glad that our weaning has been so smooth. It hasn’t been without effort, all of the above was definitely a lot of work. Early wakings, more attention required then just laying down with a boob out, gentle reminders, boundaries, more time out of the house, but it has yielded nothing but great results for both of us. I think when it works, it works, it really is akin to the stars aligning.

what may have been one of the last chest naps! These were always preceded by nursing to sleep!

what may have been one of the last chest naps! These were always preceded by nursing to sleep!

What is your experience with weaning/wanting to wean/child led weaning? Does anyone have a similar situation to the nap time nursing? I would love to hear anything and everything!

 

 

 

Thoughtful Thursday: On Being “That” Mom

me taking the 1,456th pictures of my son & I, can't get enough of him!

me taking the 1,456th pictures of my son & I – can’t get enough of him!

 

 

Happy Thursday! Today I thought I would share some random thoughts about mama-hood that are always bouncing around my head. Specifically about stereotypes and being “that” mom.

The mom that always gets funny looks & sideways glances, at the park, at toddler classes, at the museum, at restaurants. I am definitely “that” mom.

“That” Mom whose child always has snot/drool/etc. on his face

T gets a runny nose with every set of teeth that come in, it has happened every single time since his first set at 5 ½ months. I know it is due to his teeth and sometimes even progresses to a cough. Read more about that here. I know he isn’t “sick” and I follow his cues on if we need to stay home, take it easy, or go about with our normal activities. In addition to that, I try really hard every day to respect my son’s body and space. I allow him to wipe his own face and recently his dad taught him to blow his nose, yes it is not as efficient as me holding him and doing a rough swoop to get everything but when/if it bothers him, he knows how to take care of it himself.

“That” Mom who is always super late

Living on a toddler‘s timetable is a foolproof way to never get anywhere even remotely on time. T likes to take his time: waking up, getting dressed, eating, going to the bathroom, going to sleep, walking, pretty much everything. He needs natural, organic transitions from one activity to the next and we have a much more harmonious relationship when I provide that. Both of us are happier and working together and it makes for much smoother, calmer days. Do I sometimes feel like my entire life is dictated by what a very small human feels or wants right then? Yes. Is it hard to deal with sometimes? Yes. But in reality, that is my life. Right now, my entire days revolve around facilitating my son’s journey; it is a very short period in what I hope to be a very long life for him, so yes, he most often decides when.

“That” Mom who always has stuff on her clothes

Yes, I am a mess everyday. I walk and bike where we need to go and am often sweaty. I always sit on the ground with my son and inevitably get grass, dirt, dew, you name it, on my clothes. My son is also a “nibbler”. He has food out all day long (and snacks when we are out and about) and alternates between playing and eating and checking in with me for a hug, kiss, pick up, nursing and whatever is on his hands always ends up on my shirt, pants, or in my hair. If it’s not that, it’s one of the above that is now a permanent stain. At a point in the future, parenting will be much more hands off, and maybe then I will manage to keep myself clean. I parallel it with the quote by Mary Randolph Carter that “A perfectly kept house is the sign of a misspent life”. My clothes are definitely representative of all the “living” we have done that day.

‘”That” Mom who treats her toddler “like a baby”

I wear my son in a front carry most places we go. I am almost always hugging him, cuddling him, kissing him, or just rubbing his back while he sits in my lap. He sleeps in our family bed for naps and nighttime. I nurse him whenever he wants and if he wants my attention or me close by, I give it to him. He amazes me almost daily with how much he knows, understands, comprehends, and observes for someone so young. He is definitely a little person of his own, and far from having the dependant nature of an infant that only knows being close to mama, breastfeeding, and touch, but he still enjoys those things, and in my opinion, at this point they are nothing but beneficial. He will grow up and be his own, independent being, but as of now he has only been on this earth for 17 months of what will hopefully be 100+ years. In the grand scheme of things, he is still a baby.

“That” Mom who is always talking about her child

Being a mama is my job right now, and I take it very seriously. So yes, I pretty much only talk about my work. And yes, I can tell you are not that interested but it’s my life and it is pretty all consuming for me. I also am just so obsessed with my son; he is the best.

“That” Mom who never tells her child no

I was explaining “gentle hands” to T after he was hitting me the other week and another parent I was talking with commented, “Gentle hands? Does that actually work? Doesn’t he know what ‘no’ means?”

I choose to always explain why or how we do things with T. Regardless of whether or not it is most effective immediately, I believe it is the right way to interact with him and will yield the most positive behavioral results in the long run.

It has been a crazy journey thus far, but as of now I have really embraced what kind of mama I am. I find myself being less and less self conscious about all of the things above as time passes too. Mostly, it has been a lesson for me in not judging, not labeling, and not isolating myself because some people choose to do things differently. No matter what kind of mom I am, I am trying my hardest everyday and that is all that matters. Funny looks, comments, and my own insecurities aside, I try to remind myself of that as often as I can.

There is also no greater feeling than being surrounding by other mamas who support, uplift, and laugh with you no matter *what* kind of mom you are that day. Finding our tribe in Arizona was invaluable to me that first year, we are still working on finding our perfect place here in California <3

Share your thoughts with us! How do you see yourself in your role as mom? How do other people see you? Has being a mom made you less prone to judging others?? I love hearing other mamas stories and perspectives!

Family Fun: August 10-11, 2013

Looking for something to do with your family this weekend?  Cassandra and I are going to start posting events and classes in our respective geographic areas…look for us…maybe we will see you there!!

Do you have an event that you would like to add to our upcoming events calendar?  Please email me at krystynabowman {at} gmail {dot} com.  Any event that is in line with our family philosophy and/or parenting styles will be considered for listing.  Disclaimer: Inclusion in our listing does not imply endorsement by Sweet Pea Families.

SATURDAY, AUGUST 10, 2013
ARIZONA
Gilbert Farmer’s Market
7:00 am – 11:00 am
222 N. Ash St
Gilbert 85234
480-583-0101

Roadrunner Farmer’s Market
8:00 am – 1:00 pm
3502 E Cactus Rd
Phoenix 85032
623-848-1234

Payson Farmer’s Market
8:00 am – 12:00 pm
816 S. Beeline Highway
Payson 85541
602-524-0352

Train and Carousel Rides
Come out for a day of old-fashioned fun at the railroad park.  Enjoy the shade provided by the park’s many large trees  Kids can play at various play area including a covered playground with water sprays.  Train and Carousel Rides $2.00/each; free for kids under 3 with paying adult.
McCormick-Stillman Railroad park (http://www.therailroadpark.com/) @ 9:00 am to 9:00 pm
7301 E Indian Bend Rd
Scottsdale 85250
480-312-2312

Splash Pad Fun
Kids can cool off at this fun spray pad
Jaycee Park @10:00 am – 7:00 pm
817 W 5th St
Tempe 85282
80-350-8625

Dad & Toddler Storytime
Dads can enjoy stories with their favorite toddler
Mustang Library @10:30 am – 11:00 am
10101 N. 90th St.
Scottsdale, 85258
480-321-7323

Make and Take: Dusty
Bring your kids to Lowe’s for some high flying fun this weekend! Your child will love building Dusty from Disney’s Planes-In Theaters in 3D August 9th.
Your Local Lowe’s Store @ 10:00 am
Find your store HERE http://lowesbuildandgrow.com/pages/default.aspx

Water Park Fun in Chandler
Enjoy the zero-depth pool area with interactive play area, water vortex, current river and two water slides.  Cost is $2.25 for adults and $1 for children ages 2-17
Hamilton Aquatic Center @ 12:00 pm to 5:00 pm
3838 S Arizona Ave
Chandler 85248
480-782-2630

Free Crafts for Kids
Lakeshore Learning Store @ 11:00am – 3:00pm
Pet Fish Puppet
Ocean adventures await…with this colorful, kid-crafted puppet!
Find your store HERE

Family Swim at Nozomi Aquatic Center
Cost is $2.25 for adults; $1.00 for children 2-17
Nozomi Aquatic Center @ 11:am to 6:00 pm
250 S Kyrene Rd
Chandler 85226
480-783-8621

Back-to-School Beauty Bash & Bella Thorne Celebrity Appearance
Beauty Bash
Join us for Arizona’s must attend back to school shopping experience.
Featuring fashion, music, beauty, food, giveaways and BASH-tastic special offers.
Location: Macy’s Court @ 1:00 – 3:00 pm
Meet Bella Thorne from Disney’s TV Show Shake It Up
Sears Court @ 1:00 – 4:00 pm
Chandler Fashion Center
3111 W Chandler Blvd
Chandler, AZ 85226
(480) 812-8488

Fish Feeding
Come see an 18,500 gallon freshwater aquarium that offers an up-close view of trophy-sized catfish, bass, striper and blue gill.  Feeding includes an informative presentation about the fish.  Saturdays and Sundays at 2:00pm and Tuesdays at 6:00pm.  Also, everyday kids can help us feed the trout in our Trout Stream at 1:30pm.
Bass Pro Shop Trout Stream @ 1:30 pm
Bass Pro Shop Aquarium @ 2:00 pm
1133 N Dobson Rd
Mesa 85201
602-606-5600

Prowl and Play at the Phoenix Zoo
https://www.facebook.com/events/632218363460515/
The Phoenix Zoo’s summer evening event, Prowl & Play, will let guests experience the Zoo in a whole new light…or dark! This event offers unique and exciting activities which allow guests to explore, see and hear the Zoo differently than a daytime visit. Join us for magic, music and fun during the evening hours at the Zoo.
Animal viewing is limited during Prowl & Play.
Visit link for more information and ticket prices.
Phoenix Zoo @ 6:00 pm – 9:30pm
455 N. Galvin Parkway
Phoenix 85008

Free Outdoor Concert
Bring the family out to enjoy great live music performed by a variety of musicians.  Choose from two stages of entertainment
Tempe Marketplace @ 7:00 pm
2000 E Rio Salado Pkwy
Tempe 85281
480-966-9338

Free Outdoor Concert
Bring the family out to enjoy great live music performed by a variety of musicians.  Choose from two stages of entertainment
Desert Ridge Marketplace @ 7:00 – 9:00 pm
21001 N Tatum Blvd
Phoenix 85050
480-513-7586

CALIFORNIA
Pacific Grove Prenatal Yoga
http://www.seasideyogasanctuary.com/OurSite/prenatal-yoga
Seaside Yoga Sanctuary @ 10:30-11:45
170 Central Ave
Pacific Grove, CA

Organic Strawberry U-Pick
(https://www.facebook.com/events/547374708633186/)
Come on out and pick your fill of delicious organic berries! The strawberry patch is full of ripe fruit. Make amazing desserts, jam or just freeze a bunch for smoothies.
Cost: $1.75/lb. Bring your own containers if you can. We’ll have empty flats available too.
Redman House Farmstand @ 11 AM to 5 PM.
200 Lee Rd.
Watsonville, CA

SUNDAY, AUGUST 11, 2013
ARIZONA
Ahwatukee Farmers Market
9:00 am – 1:00 pm
4700 E Warner Rd
Phoenix, 85004
602-919-0914

Train and Carousel Rides
Come out for a day of old-fashioned fun at the railroad park.  Enjoy the shade provided by the park’s many large trees. Kids can play at various play area including a covered playground with water sprays.  Train and Carousel Rides $2.00/each; free for kids under 3 with paying adult.
(http://www.therailroadpark.com/)
McCormick-Stillman Railroad Park @ 9:00 am – 9:00 pm
7301 E Indian Bend Rd
Scottsdale 85250
480-312-2312

Family Swim at Desert Oasis Aquatic Center
Zero-depth pool area with kiddie slide, rain drop and spray whale, 112 ft. figure 8 water slide, shade ramadas, concession stand and sand volleyball court.  Cost is $2.25 for adults, $1.00 for children ages 2-17
Desert Oasis Aquatic Center @ 12:00 pm – 6:00 pm
1400 W Summit Place
Chandler, AZ 85224
480-732-1061

Water Park Fun in Chandler
Enjoy the zero-depth pool area with interactive play area, water vortex, current river and two water slides.  Cost is $2.25 for adults and $1 for children ages 2-17
Hamilton Aquatic Center @ 12:00 pm to 5:00 pm
3838 S Arizona Ave
Chandler 85248
480-782-2630

Fish Feeding
Come see an 18,500 gallon freshwater aquarium that offers an up-close view of trophy-sized catfish, bass, striper and blue gill.  Feeding includes an informative presentation about the fish.  Saturdays and Sundays at 2:00pm and Tuesdays at 6:00pm.  Also, everyday kids can help us feed the trout in our Trout Stream at 1:30pm.
Bass Pro Shop Trout Stream @ 1:30 pm
Bass Pro Shop Aquarium @ 2:00 pm
1133 N Dobson Rd
Mesa 85201
602-606-5600

Make and Take: Dusty
Bring your kids to Lowe’s for some high flying fun this weekend! Your child will love building Dusty from Disney’s Planes-In Theaters in 3D August 9th.
Your local Lowe’s store @ 2:00 pm
Find your store HERE: http://lowesbuildandgrow.com/pages/default.aspx

CALIFORNIA EVENTS
Sunday Blues & Art in the Park
Celebrate a Seaside tradition of Blues and Art in the Park with free Sunday concerts during in July and August. Bring the whole family (but leave the dogs at home…they are not permitted in the park!). Bring a picnic and enjoy performances by Fry-Wright Band and Mingo Fishtrap’s Blues Band. For more information, click here or call (831) 899-6800
http://www.mbaykids.com/happenings.asp
Laguna Grande Park @ 1:00 pm – 4:30 pm
Canyon Del Rey Boulevard
Seaside, CA

Organic Strawberry U-Pick
(https://www.facebook.com/events/547374708633186/)
Come on out and pick your fill of delicious organic berries! The strawberry patch is full of ripe fruit. Make amazing desserts, jam or just freeze a bunch for smoothies.
Cost: $1.75/lb. Bring your own containers if you can. We’ll have empty flats available too.
Redman House Farmstand @ 11 AM to 5 PM.
200 Lee Rd.
Watsonville, CA

Little Eater: How We Try to Create Healthy Habits

Eating is such a personal topic, some people love to eat, and others hate to eat. Some folks over eat, some forget to eat, some eat slowly, and some eat fast and often people are very defensive regarding their choices or habits. Anyone who has ever tried to research diet and nutrition also knows there is a vast, overwhelming sea of conflicting information out there over what to eat, how much of it, when to eat it, ways to prepare it, where to find it, etc.

Last time I was here talking about how we are still breastfeeding past age one, but today I am discussing baby’s other nutrition, solid foods! We first introduced solids at six months old and I thought I would share some things we have implemented over the past eight months that we believe will help our son establish a healthy relationship with food and learn to nourish himself optimally from the very start.

Baby Led Weaning:

Krystyna chronicled her family’s journey with Baby Led Weaning and their youngest child in detail here if you are interested in more information about the actual approach and implementation. We chose BLW because it allows baby to explore food in different forms, exposes them to different tastes and textures depending on preparation, is aligned with our “whole foods” approach to eating and most importantly allows baby to have control over physically feeding him or herself along with determining when to stop or continue eating.

Meal Times & The Family Table:

When we first began giving my son, T, food to explore he sat in his Bumbo with attached tray. We would sit on the floor next to him and eat our food while he spent time discovering the food in front of him.

IMG_3277First Foods

When he outgrew the Bumbo seat we got a highchair that goes on one of the kitchen table chairs and pulls right up to the table, no attached tray. 

IMG_6816At our table – clearly, he is comfortable.

When he became increasingly more mobile and not content in the high chair, around a year old, we got a low to the ground kitchen table with floor cushions for our dining area and a wooden child size table and two chairs for his room. At the dining table he gets in and out of his chair when he wants, sometimes eats standing up at the table, and sometimes grabs food off of our plates. The table in his room usually has some snacks on it throughout the day for him to graze. I know this isn’t practical or conducive to everyone’s lifestyle, but it works for us. We love being on our son’s level and spend most of our days on the floor with him anyways so sitting on the floor at a low dining table isn’t really that much of an adjustment for us. We always place his food directly on whichever table we are eating from and use this silicone placemat from Green Sprouts.

IMG_7746Enjoying a snack at his table.

IMG_7849Unconventional eating 🙂

Incorporating our son into our meal times, what we are eating ourselves and the table we are eating it from, has been very important to us. We want him to see us fueling our bodies with the same things he is. We want him to hear as I tell my husband what I have prepared that night and how and to be involved in the mealtime because he wants to be, not just because he is constrained.

Variety of Healthy Choices:

We offer a variety of choices all day, every day. For breakfast it is usually two or more options rotating between fruits, soaked oatmeal, eggs, green smoothies, coconut/almond yogurt, and nut butters. Mid day snacks and lunch always consist of multiple different foods as well: quinoa, vegetables, rice, olives, possibly more fruit, avocados, more nut butters, hummus, beans, chicken, and fish and dinner is his own serving of whatever my husband and I are having. He honestly doesn’t have foods that he “hates” or “loves” yet, sometimes he will reject things, and sometimes he will gobble up those same foods. Sometimes he throws food on the floor; sometimes he feeds food to the dog. Sometimes he chews his food and spits it out and sometimes he wants me to eat something first and then he will. I don’t react to any of this behavior, when it comes to food, I am in charge of providing the options and he is in charge of what he does with them. No matter the outcome I continue offering a rotating variety of seasonal, whole foods.

Limit Refined Sugar & Sweeteners:

We had an absolute, hard and fast NO refined sugar or sweeteners rule until 12 months. Around twelve months I began using small bits of maple syrup to sweeten things like pancake batters and chia puddings. Around that time we also introduced raw, local honey for the first time and now use that sparingly in things like dressings, marinades, etc. We are very limited on the number of packaged foods T eats but there have been a couple of times he has been given good quality snack type bars with agave or some organic, gluten free snack bunnies that have cane sugar in them as a special treat in the car seat. I strongly believe that by very strictly limiting refined sugar and sweetener intake it allows his natural taste preferences for real, whole foods to flourish.

Relaxed Attitude:

Overall, I think our relaxed attitude towards eating behavior is what we feel will benefit our son’s eating habits the most. Sometimes I wake up in the morning and am starving, sometimes I have things I want to do first before I eat, and sometimes I don’t find myself hungry until 10 or 11 AM. In these instances my husband doesn’t force me to sit down and eat breakfast with him or ever force me to eat foods that don’t sound appealing. Some days certain things sound good, and others days they do not. Keeping in mind that our little man is just the same as us in this regard allows me to feel good about letting him choose how and when and what he eats. As long as all of the options provided are healthy, it makes no difference to me. I also always remember that he is still breastfeeding, so if he doesn’t eat a large quantity one day, there is no need to stress. He is getting plenty of nutrition from my milk and he will make up for it by eating more food in the coming days. Empowering T to not only choose but also then physically feed himself feels so great; watching him navigate food and eat still brings me joy like I am seeing it for the first time. It is much messier, sometimes wasteful, much more inconvenient at times, and takes a lot of work to not only prepare fresh food AND multiple options, but, as the saying goes: “Nothing worth doing is ever easy”. Doing what I believe could help my son learn to sustain his body naturally and optimally is definitely worth it to me!

I could talk food and eating all day and would love to hear from you in the comments! How do you feed your baby or toddler? Have you seen the impacts of your choices on your older children if you have them? What do you think best creates a healthy relationship with food and eating?