Category Archives: Children

SOS: Help! It’s HOT! Going crazy inside!!

Posted by Krystyna Bowman

This was originally posted last July, but as many of you are probably finding yourself at the end of your patience with these high temps & lack of indoor activities we thought it would be helpful to revisit a few ideas!

July August is here, and the heat of Arizona is officially upon us!! Even if you are not living in AZ, you may also be in need of indoor play ideas in your part of the world. Since the temperature is only going up, I want to share some ideas to enjoy the summer with your family and not get overheated.

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Do you like to be outdoors?  The Phoenix Zoo and the Desert Botanical Gardens offer earlier open times – maybe the one in your area does, too.  We have always enjoyed going early in the day when the mornings are under the 100F mark.  The city parks are opening their splash pads – check out your city’s website and find out locations and hours.

If you have a little room in your budget, you can sign up for classes in your child’s age group.  Here are some ideas: music, gymnastics, swimming lessons, summer camps held at churches or dance schools.

Are there any museums in your area?  You can see if they offer special programming for children, and ask if they offer group discounts.  Maybe you can get some friends together for a discount while having a museum playdate!!  In addition, check your local museums for Family Free Days over the summer months.  We have found that arriving right at opening time, or going a couple of hours before closing helps to avoid the crowds.   Museums let us enjoy some time out of the house and out of the sun while allowing our little explorers all kinds of growth opportunities.

If you are on a tight budget, pick some different places to go out every day.  You can still find plenty of ways to learn and grow – you just have to get a little more creative!  Here is a money-saving idea:  Let your destination pay for air conditioning!  Make it a point to leave the house while your kiddo and you are fresh and rested.  Here are some free places that you can go for a walkabout:

  • Shopping malls – be brave and drive a little farther. Go to one that isn’t in your neighborhood and you get A/C time coming and going as well!  While you are there, explore the children’s stores that have toys out for the kiddos to sample.  Our favorite place is Pottery Barn Kids.  I don’t like having the big playsets in our home, however, it’s great to have the kids go there and enjoy them, and then get to leave them behind!  Many shopping centers open early for mall walkers – it’s a great time to go to the children’s play areas before the stores open and the mall gets more crowded.  The story times/ mall activities listed in this month’s newsletters (activities in the Chandler, AZ area) all start between 10:00 am and 10:30 pm – depending on how your child naps, you might be able to do both, and then head home and get some chores done while your tired baby sleeps.
  • Big super-stores like PetSmart, Walmart and Target.  I like PetSmart and Walmart because they have lots of fish tanks+ with live fish to explore.  Here are the kiddos and Bruss playing with the fishing poles at Walmart – all the fun, none of the clutter 🙂Blog4 1375
  • Bass Pro Shop – they have a fish pond where the kiddos can learn to fish, plus lots of other things to see and explore.  Kiddos can enjoy some of the displays – Bruss says some of them are climbable!
  • Bookstore – Barnes & Noble has a great kids area with a reading area plus a different selection of books than you might find at the library.  You can look over on the “meetings and groups” list to find the monthly listing for their story times.
  • Grocery Store – instead of making a mad dash through the place with your list, go with the time and the intention of walking up and down all the aisles.  There are lots of foods to explore in the produce section, you can take your time and look in all the display cases, you can touch the doors in the frozen food section, and take in all the colors as you talk about how things are sorted, grouped and why your family makes the food choices that they make.  There are lots of smells to identify, with the added bonus of sensory items to touch in the pet aisle.
  • Office Buildings – does coach, or another family member or friend work in a high rise?  How about going to visit them?  While you are there, ride the elevator and look at some of the artwork along the different floors of the building.  You can get off at the different floors and observe the different views that you see at different heights.  You can check your local listings to see if there is a top deck restaurant that offers a 360 degree view of your city while you are dining.

You can also take advantage of the public libraries.  Pack yourself plenty of water, a couple of portable snacks, and head over to the stacks to hang out for a while before and/or after library activities.

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Need a day at home?  How about doing some sensory play?  One of our best investments was a sand and water table we bought when our oldest was a toddler.  We lost the lid a long time ago, however the base is still sturdy and usable.  You can do all water, or a mix of sand and water, or all sand.  Get out the stackable cups and measuring spoons you already have around the house and let your kids measure and pour to their hearts content!  You can hide toys in the sand.

We have also set up a water station in the kitchen.  We lay out a few towels first, and then fill different size pots with varying amounts of water.  If you are so inclined, you can set out some rice, beans, or pastas for the kiddos to “cook” with.  Let them spoon, measure and pour and get nice and wet.  As an added bonus, you can get a chore done by breaking out your mop when it’s time to clean up!

Do you have a “safe” place for your kiddos to play in the kitchen?  Maybe you can set up a drawer, a cabinet and a pantry shelf that are “safe” for them.  Ask them to look in the different places for different things – maybe a mini-scavenger hunt for all the items they will use at their water station!

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How about a fort?  Here is a fort we made using a kit the kiddos got for Christmas.  However, there is nothing wrong with taking a sheet and hanging it over a table, or taking some chairs into the middle of a room and hanging a sheet over those.  It’s great fun to play peek-a-boo, or create a temporary reading nook with a new twist.

HERE is a list of other sensory ideas that you can easily set up at home when your kiddos are tired of playing with their regular toys and walking through the house has become an exercise in futility.  My favorite on this list is freezing toys into a block of ice and then letting the kiddos carve them out with spoons.  That would feel really great when it’s 117F outside!

Send us your pictures of indoor fun!  What is your family’s favorite indoor, beat the heat idea?

Disclaimer:
The material included on this site is for informational purposes only.
It is not intended nor implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice. The reader should always consult her or his healthcare provider to determine the appropriateness of the information for their own situation.  Krystyna and Bruss Bowman and Bowman House, LLC accept no liability for the content of this site, or for the consequences of any actions taken on the basis of the information provided.

A Tale of Potty Training

A Tale of Potty Training in which Otter validates my belief in attachment parenting

Through this journey of mothering, my philosophy has become, “drop the book, read the child”.  I do not discount the books out of hand – many of them have sage advice and are written by experienced professionals and parents.  I offer our students the La Leche League approach: treat the information that is offered as a buffet; take what is appealing and leave the rest.  My mantra has become, “Honor The Child”.

A wise aunt of mine once told me that our children are gifted to us to be our teachers.   I have tried to embrace that concept whole-heartedly.  Yet every once in a while, they remind me again of their role in my life.  Oh, that Otter.  She continues to teach me about mothering although I am already ten years into this adventure.

Her latest lesson to me arrived via potty training: it’s the promise of that glorious day when you don’t have to change another diaper…especially those of the “stinky, poop-y, how-does-all-this-fit-into-your-tiny-body diapers that have you running to the toilet as you gag to empty them” variety.

There are SO MANY books on potty training on the market – a quick search on-line yields several titles that promise an easy passage to the promised land.  There are videos you can buy, books written for children to ease the transition, and if you are a family with a fluid bottom line, you can hire a potty coach for $925/day! (Read about that trend HERE.)

She did not want to know what we knew; she did not care that we had already potty trained three children.  She was on her own path.

Winter 2012: Otter showed early signs of being ready to use the potty.  The winter after her first birthday, she sat down and used the potty chair – she was probably 15 months old.  Then she did it again.  When she wasn’t around the potty, she told us that she had gone potty and that we needed to change her. And she couldn’t stand to be in a poopy diaper – I was thrilled!! Were we really going to be free of diapers so soon?!?

Alas, it was not to be.  After a promising week, she started screaming when we brought her near the potty.  She much preferred to do her business in her diaper and then have someone change her *immediately*.  As an attachment parent, I went with the flow, so to speak.  I did not want to push her into something that she was not ready for and forced her into tears.

Spring 2013: The pressure starts to build.  A few mamas of Sweet Peas born from our Fall 2011 and Winter2011-12 classes are announcing that their little ones are sitting on the potty.  They are using it.  A few are actually potty trained!!  What?!?  These children are younger than Otter and they are out of diapers already?

Summer 2013: So I bring out the potty again.  I figure different space, different place; maybe we’ll have a different result.  Still the same reaction – tears and screaming.  I put it back up with the resolution to just let Otter be Otter.  I *know* that it is developmentally impossible for her to be in diapers forever.  Breathe. Mantra. Repeat.

Fall 2013:  More Sweet Pea babies younger than Otter are potty trained.  Breathe. Mantra. Repeat.

WInter 2013: Otter wants to be in the Christmas show with her siblings.  We remind her that she is not in dance classes yet and she cannot dance on stage with them.  However…light bulb moment…we point out that all of the children dancing are out of diapers.  Especially the ones in her favorite number, Santa Baby, a daddy-daughter dance performed by the youngest students in the school.

New strategy!! Instead of offering the training potty, every once in a while, we will drop the line, “It’s okay to keep using diapers.  You’ll have to be out of them if you want to dance in Santa Baby – no diapers on stage!”

Spring 2014: We go to birthday parties for Otter’s contemporaries from our Bradley Classes.  They are out of diapers.  We are still lugging our diaper bag around, albeit a very adorable tokidoki bag.  The SPB alumni mamas tell me what they are doing to facilitate potty training.  A mama from our Fall 2012 class is actively training her one-year-old.  I begin to question if I am crazy to just leave Otter alone and leave her in diapers until she is ready.

YES to leaving her alone, jury is out as to whether I am crazy.  Honor the child. Breathe. Mantra. Repeat.

May 2014:  The diaper service we use announces it’s going out of business. We warn her that her diaper days are numbered.  Diaper service ends and she is distraught to be in training pants, even the adorable ones in patterns she is familiar with since they look like her diaper wraps.  After two days of an unhappy Otter, we decide to buy organic disposable diapers by the sleeve because we Honor The Child.  She is waking up dry, even with night nursing.  I offer the potty in the morning as an alternative to wetting the diaper and an immediate change.  She declines.  For weeks.

Sunday, June 22, 2014: Otter sits on the training potty that we have left, lonely in the bathroom, for months.  She pees.  She stands up and announces, “I am ready to do Santa Baby.”  She was “potty trained” at two years and eight months – done with never another day in diapers.  Or thirty-two months old if you prefer that method of accounting.

No joke.  Since that day six weeks ago she has had exactly two accidents.  One the next day when she was playing with a friend and was too distracted to really go potty and she let the rest go when she came back to play.  And one a week later, strangely enough, overnight when she wet the bed after waking up dry for weeks.

It has been a great validation to Honor The Child.  Once I stopped offering the option to use the training potty, neither of us shed a tear in this non-process.  She is done, without the  mess of soiled clothing, misses on the floor, and a training potty to empty over and over again.  I do not miss the piles of laundry covered in human waste!! That was awesome.

Now, we do keep the training potty available – she doesn’t always want to use the “big potty”.  I figure that is a fair trade.

Breathe.  Honor The Child. Repeat.

Do you have an AP “Aha” moment to share?

Monday Musings: Healing

What does that mean, really? HEALING.

Is it from one ailment? Good enough to function? Or am I praying for truly a complete, transformational healing that changes a life?

Let me back up.  Puma has been struggling with her bowels for years.  It started when she was about five years old.  We suspected food poisoning, and later blood tests showed Hepatitis A, which is generally an indicator of food poisoning.  As our pediatrician told us, “you could get it from lettuce in a salad bar”.

Ever since then, she has not been well.  After going the Western allopathic route with no positive results, and the weekly visits to the chiropractor that started when she was six years old didn’t resolve the issue, we started working with an acupuncturist when she was around seven.  He has an Asyra machine that evaluates the whole body….after three sessions, we were able to get that her body was not tolerating gluten.  An answer!

So we cut out gluten – things got better.  Then she got hit with Rotavirus last April (2013).  Her little body could not recover from that on her own and we ended up with a five-day hospitalization.  Little by little she got stronger and added more weight.  Things started to improve again – life goes on.

Last September, I start having this nagging suspicion that something is still not right. After the “summer growth spurt” children go through, I see that she is among the “small” ones in her peer group as other girls her age have added inches to their stature.  Then Night Owl, who is 2 years and 9 months younger is gaining on her height (he is actually now taller than she is.)  I begin to wonder if maybe, just maybe, this gut “thing” is still preventing her from using all the nutrients in her food, and if I will have any regrets if I don’t follow up.

So after talking with Bruss, praying about it, we decide it is time to go the allopathic route again. She does another round of blood work; our pediatrician recommends a naturally-minded GI specialist.  We make the appointment and are counting down the days until we take another stab at getting some answers and some kind of solution.

In the meantime, Puma comes down with another virus.  It is suspected to be Norovirus.  Thank goodness there is no vomiting this time (we know if that happens, we try the Zofran and if Zofran doesn’t work we need to go to the hospital…) – anyway, it’s just a gradual decline into helplessness as I watch our child fall into despair and listlessness and she refuses to eat because she knows it’s just coming right out the other side.  I hear her crying every time she is in the bathroom, and one morning she asks me, “Why me – why am I always in the bathroom?”

I remember the lesson she taught me – ask for prayer – plain and simple.  I send out an email to our family requesting prayer.  The next morning, I have a revelation that I am praying for her to get better.  What I really should be praying for is not just for her to get better, but a full, complete HEALING.  Entire body well.  Entire body functional.  Entire.

Why does that scare me?  If she is off gluten (and Night Owl is also GF among other allergies), we have the perfect reason to keep wheat out of the house.  That crop scares me – it’s primarily GMO, highly processed, and found in all the foods we so conveniently and thankfully keep out of the house.  I often say that our children’s allergies are the best thing that ever happened to us – it forced us into whole food eating without a fuss.

If Puma, and Night Owl for that matter, are HEALED, then the food restrictions go away.  AWAY.  It means that they can eat anything.  I had to ask myself if there is pain/pleasure disconnect in my children’s suffering and my desire to have the simple answer, “You know you cannot have that,” and it’s the end of a discussion.

I had to face the reality that if I trust that God is the Supreme Healer, and that He wants the best for us, then I must pray for a complete healing.  I have to trust that He can heal, and I have to believe that is the best for our children.  He did not design us to be sick and intolerant of his wonderful provision.  We are to be healthy, full expressions of His Glory.

I must pray for complete healing, and then change the paradigm for our food choices.  We are not going to avoid foods because we have allergies anymore.  We will make wise choices that nourish and feed our healthy bodies and souls.  All the same rules still apply – the motivation behind our food choices must change to accept that my children can be healed if that is God’s will for our lives.

So I wrote down the prayer that was in my heart – it came to me almost as soon as I had the revelation that I was praying the wrong prayer.  Here it is for you to share in communion with me, and join me if you are so inclined, or maybe they will be a blessing to someone you love.

This is my parent’s prayer:

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Prayer for a child – I say her name when I pray for her.

And I also wrote down a version for Puma to keep at her bedside and pray if she wanted to pray for her own healing:

Prayer that Puma can read and pray if she is led to do so

Prayer that Puma can read and pray if she is led to do so

I had an initial gut-check – I have seen the blogs of parents who pray for healing and the answer is a child that is called back to God.  Who am I to pray for a complete healing?  Can I be so bold?  And the answer I get is YES. A resounding YES because I felt called to pray this prayer.  I cannot know what the answer is.  I just know that I am called to faith and prayer.

So every morning, I start with the Our Father and then this.  I trust in all the goodness and the glory of Our Maker.

(P.S. Thanks to some direction from our chiropractor on what she needed to take, and the combined voices of our family joining mine in prayer, Puma woke up the next morning so much better than the day before.  By the third day, she was back to what I would call herself.  God has already showed me that I just need to have faith.)

Gluten-Free Easter

We have children with food allergies…biggest one being gluten.  We also stay away from soy and artificial food coloring.  So we are doing lots of toys and limited candy.

Here is what I have lined up for their Easter baskets so all the kiddos have the same loot and I don’t have to worry about cross-contamination or curiosity:

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I literally cannot bring myself to buy any other chocolate out there – this is literally the best and they are starting to make more child-friendly flavors. They weren’t too crazy about the chili or the orange infused pieces…peppermint was a big hit, and I am guessing that the pink salt is going to disappear 🙂

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Gummy fruit

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Lollipops

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Dr. McStuffins is a little juvenile for Puma, got them because she wants to be a vet when she grows up; Otter will love the little food and water to feed her babies.

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Pinball games for the boys

We also have a VERY SPECIAL DELIVERY coming from Georgetown Cupcake – can’t wait to see their faces when we get to Easter Brunch at my aunt’s house on Sunday and they have their GF Easter treats from their favorite cupcake shoppe 🙂

I waived the sugar restriction because I am willing to put up with a couple of days of crazy (it literally makes Night Owl into a filter-less maniac) so that we can treat them to some candy.  I am fingers-crossed that we all survive.  Monday will probably be a reading day for Night Owl – I don’t know if he will be able to be still…

For those of you that celebrate, have a blessed Easter.  I know that the season has nothing to do with eggs and bunnies, really.  We are so thankful for God’s mercy and the sacrifice of His beloved Son for our redemption and salvation.  As I embrace and treasure our children, I cannot even imagine the love that God and Jesus have for us – it is beyond my human understanding.

There is always Grace

Sorry I have not been very active on here this week.  We did some spring cleaning and are preparing for a very special guest and event this weekend.

So while I don’t have any ‘day in the life of” writing to share today, here is a story from a couple of week’s ago.  We are very spiritual people, although I wouldn’t say we are religious.  Whenever the opportunity comes up to share the grace of God, I feel called to share it.  Maybe someone reading it needs a reminder that there is a bigger picture and a master plan.  Maybe someone needs to know that we are loved.  We certainly felt all of those things as we reflected on the day.  Most of all, we are just continually humbled by God’s grace and mercy…we know He loves us because we see His hand in our children’s lives over and over again.

It took me some time to process the day…sometimes it’s hard to let go of the “could haves” and “what ifs” and get to the unending praise.  Here is how we found out that Otter is very reactive to scorpions, and why she will never get to walk barefoot on our patio again.  Thank goodness we have some grass for her to enjoy.

Otter’s Scorpion Story

Sunday, March 2, 2014

Sunday morning: usually involves craziness as we get ready to go to church.  In addition to the usual crazy, we were getting ready to host a class reunion for our Fall 2012 Class later that day.  Daddy Bruss and Otter were outside, moving furniture, and getting ready to clean the coolers.  A scorpion was under one of the cooler, and Otter unwittingly stepped on it when the cooler was moved.

Daddy Bruss came in calling my name.  The fact that he was saying “Krystyna” over and over again instead of calling me Mommy tipped me off that something was wrong.  I met them in the kitchen and we put her foot over the sink to rinse it off.  We made a baking powder paste on her foot, and held her there with some ice.  She wanted to nurse, so we did that, too.

We texted our amazing chiropractor to check in with him.  He does this “thing” where he can check in with us remotely…he suggested a baking soda paste…checked off the “we did the right thing” box and thought we were going to be in the clear with this sting incident.

She calmed down – we calmed down.  Ten minutes later, we got her off the counter and we went on with getting ready.  Kids dressed, food packed, it was my turn to get in the shower…and Otter starts crying inconsolably.  She said her “peepee” hurt – I thought maybe she was feeling a little numbness from the sting.  Then along with crying she starts to spit…this was not looking like the after-effects of the other children’s scorpion stings.

We called poison control and found out that if she was spitting and her symptoms were intensifying, we should go straight the hospital emergency room.  We loaded everyone up in the car, I quickly rinsed my face, and I hope I brushed my teeth!

As we were pulling out of our community, a caravan of bikers – hundreds of them, blocked us.  They were not going to let us pass – they were exercising their right of way.  I started banging on the windows, and Bruss rolled down his window to tell them we needed to pass – we were on the way to the E/R.  They were blocking traffic for fully two miles.  They took up one whole lane, and another lane was blocked by construction barriers – not a lot of room to maneuver when you are in a rush to get to the hospital.

Meanwhile, Otter is still screaming & spitting…cue the vomiting…. and I am beside myself.  I am begging Bruss to honk the horn and roll down the windows so we can tell these people to move over.  I don’t know how we got to the hospital in one piece – it was a lot of crazy driving.

Once we finally get past the bikers and the traffic blocks, the hospital E/R entrance we are familiar with is gone!  Due to construction, everything is re-routed there, too.  We finally get to the door.  I jumped out with Otter and ran into the E/R.

I quickly tell the desk person that a scorpion stung our daughter, and that poison control sent us to the E/R.  She takes one look at Otter and puts a call in to take us straight back – and straight back we go.  Within a few minutes, we have a doctor there with three nurses and a respiratory therapist.  He tells us the course of treatment, gets our consent, and starts the process.

Somewhere in here Bruss grabs my phone and calls his sister, Cindy, to see if she can come take care of our older children so they don’t have to be in the E/R with us. She is available, and comes over to watch the kiddos.

As part of the consent, I tell them I will only consent to them trying to put an IV in Otter if they will find their best person to do it.  I tell them, “I know I sound like a crazy mother – I am telling you her veins are tricky.  They look good, but they blow the minute you put pressure on them.”  They give me their pat answer…and proceed to blow two veins in her foot that they thought “looked good”.  I contain my, “I told you so!”

Now they really believe me and call up to the pediatric unit to have someone come down.  The charge nurse arrives, and she blows one in the crook of her left arm that looked good.  One of the other nurses who has been holding her arm points out a vein up by her shoulder that looks good and strong.

Up to this point, I had been singing her Twinkle Little Star in Spanish.  I can tell the nurse is freaking out a little, and I want to pray but I don’t want to stop singing, so I start singing the Lord’s Prayer so Otter can hear my voice and I can still say a prayer. 

 The pediatric nurse is nervous about it, and the other nurses chime in and encourage her to try anyway.  “A vein is a vein,” they say, and lo and behold, it goes in.

Praise God – we have a line in and they can start the medication, known as “anti-scorp”.

Doctor is holding her shoulders and stabilizing her head, one nurse is holding her left arm, Bruss has his hand on her chest, another nurse is holding her hips and knees, I am at her right side making eye contact and talking to her, and then to my left is the respiratory tech with oxygen and the “vacuum” to keep her from choking on her saliva and vomit.  Three rounds of medication go in…the saliva production is starting to slow down.  She is still screaming bloody murder and insisting that she is done and wants to go home.

The doctor assures us that all the symptoms we are seeing are the effects of the venom: screaming, thrashing, spitting, vomiting, eyes shuddering and unable to focus.  He points out how easy it would be to believe in demon possession when you see all these symptoms exhibited at one time.

We have to keep holding her as we wait for the timer to tell us that it is time for the next round of medication…she doesn’t like the cold feeling and gets amped up again when the fourth dose is started.  That runs it’s course and her eyes settle down a little and she isn’t thrashing so much.  The vomiting has stopped, although she is still spitting a bit.

We still have to calm her as we wait for time for the fifth round.  The timer is up again, and the fifth dose is administered.  By the time the fifth round is done, her eyes are able to focus again, the saliva and spitting are under control, and she is still asking to go home now.

We were able to let her up after that fifth dose.  We asked that they tape up the IV line because it was clearly bothering her.  Good thing they did because the first thing she did once unwrapped her from the swaddle in the sheet and her arms were free: she went straight for the IV line.  My “mama quick” reactions blocked her hand and I tucked it under my left arm as I cradled her.  She was still agitated and unwilling to sit still.  We walked a couple of laps around the nurse’s station.  After a few minutes, she had settled down enough to nurse.

Thank God for nursing - once she was settled it was exactly what we both needed to connect and feed our tired girl.

Thank God for nursing – once she was settled it was exactly what we both needed to connect and feed our tired girl.

Within 5-10 minutes she was sound asleep.  I heard her breathing start to sound labored, so we asked the nurse to check her.  She called the doctor and came to listen herself.  We were assured that it was probably just the congestion in her sinuses from the fluid and the crying.  Doc came in and confirmed that.  We were kept for about an hour after the last dose for observation.

Finally sleeping peacefully after an eventful morning.

Finally sleeping peacefully after an eventful morning.

As we are waiting, I start to get texts from students.  I wonder how they found out we were in the hospital…when one spills the beans…they saw a post on Instagram and wonder if she is okay.

Instagram??  I take a look at my account.  While the kiddos were in the waiting room with my phone, Puma took a picture of she and Charger, and posted a plea for prayers for our family since Otter was in the hospital.  I was touched to the point of tears – what a blessing that our eldest daughter’s first instinct in a situation like this was to post a prayer request!

Otter woke up, they took one more listen, signed off on us going home, and took out the IV.  We left not a moment to soon.   As we were leaving, another patient who was being administered CPR was waiting to be wheeled into the room we had vacated.

We went home, where Cindy helped get the kiddos settled, took a take-out order, and went off to Rubio’s with the older three to pick up lunch.  Bruss and I got ready for class and our reunion.

I taught the early-bird class, we held the class reunion…and then it was time to regroup and reflect on the day as a family.  Somewhere in the events of the day Puma shared with me that she had been so scared; so she pulled the boys into a corner at the hospital waiting room and led them in prayer for Otter and the doctors taking care of her.  Again, from the mouth of babes: pray – call on His name for all things.

We went around the room and each of us shared:
Me: Thanked the kiddos for their amazing teamwork and behavior.  Thanked Puma for remembering to pray, Night Owl and Charger for behaving, Daddy Bruss for getting us to the hospital safely.

Puma: Aunt Cindy not being in yoga class that morning so that she could come take care of them.

Night Owl: Thankful Otter was okay now, and for our family

Charger: Was thankful for the doctors that took care of Otter

Daddy: The scientists who developed the medicine and the doctors and patients who tested it.  He also thanked the kiddos for being amazing today.

God’s hand in all this:

  • Otter was stung during the day – we “have heard” that the best staff at the hospital is the day shift.
  • She was stung by a mature scorpion that measures it’s dose of venom.  Baby scorpions give you all they’ve got since they do not know how to regulate their sting.  Given Otter’s severe reaction, I cannot even begin to imagine how much worse it could have been.
  • Finding a usable vein with only two people trying, and finding it within minutes when the second person tried to run the IV.
  • A doctor with a newborn daughter who was moved to personally provide care the whole time Otter was being administered the medicine, instead of leaving a nurse or PA to take his place.
  • Cindy was not in yoga class as she usually is on Sunday mornings and she was available to come down and help.
  • Puma, Night Owl and Charger were visited by a therapy dog in the waiting room.  Her name was Lexee, a Red Setter…looked so much like the dogs my Nana Mil used to have…hi, Nana <3…a reminder from heaven that God is always with us.

It was a scary day.  It was a day that worked God’s blessings and grace in so many ways.  As I read over the story again as we brace ourselves for another full and wonderful weekend, I am reminded of the lesson Puma taught me…just pray and receive the grace.

P.S. Big props to the E/R crew at the Chandler Regional Hospital that morning.  I love that we received care in a Catholic hospital.  IMO it never hurts to have the Holy Family on your side when you are receiving medical care.

Tuesday Tips: Greening Your School

I am so honored to be helping my friend Rebecca Fleischmann help raise awareness about her passion, reducing toxins in a child’s environment.  We met when she was a student in our Bradley Method® classes, and she really opened my eyes to the areas we could improve on as a family that was going green.  She has helped me update the information we share about pregnancy nutrition – you can read that post HERE.

She is now involved with a company called Healthy Green Schools.  It is definitely a vehicle to bring a better experience to children everywhere.  Please take a minute to read our Q&A and contact her to help you make a difference for your child.

Why it’s important:

“Children spend so much time in school, and this is where we can make a huge impact.”

Tell me a little about Healthy Green Schools – what is the mission?
Our mission statement:  Healthy Green Schools is a unique program that protects children by reducing and eliminating asthmagens, allergens and toxins in our schools through education of administration, staff and parents. Healthy Green Schools is a hands-on, fun, robust program that includes addressing healthy foods, setting up “child-friendly” recycling and more. Our program aims to create sustainable, long-term, healthy changes for children, staff and our planet through education and grassroots momentum.

When did you become aware that this was important?
I became aware that this was important when I started working as a teacher.  I saw just how many cleaning products were being used on a day to day basis.  I also noticed how many children has respiratory issues, developmental delays, allergies, and ADD.  It has changed so dramatically since I started working with children at a young age.  Almost every classroom had a sign posted listing the food items that were not allowed in the classroom.   Children spend so much time in school, and this is where we can make a huge impact.

What are some symptoms that your child may be exhibiting that are an indicator they may be allergic to something being used in their school environment?
Children can exhibit  a multitude of symptoms as a result of an environmental allergen.  The most common would be cold like symptoms.  Any respiratory issues, headaches, hives, or rashes can be an indicator of an allergic reaction or sensitivity to chemical cleaners.  Many of these chemicals area also known asthmagens.

What are the benefits to greening a school?
There are so many benefits to greening your school.  Over the past 50 years over 80,000 chemicals have been introduced and dispersed into our society.  Of these, only 200 have been tested for safety, and only 5 have been regulated.  Children are more susceptible to the negative impacts of these chemical due to the fact that they small.  A child breathes up to twice as much air as adults do.  Indoor air pollution is 5 to 10 times worse than outdoor air pollution.  By switching to non toxic cleaners, the indoor air pollution is reduced to 1/6th of that amount.  Children are also putting their hands in their mouth a lot, so that is another was that they are exposed to these chemicals.  Switching to non toxic cleaners has been shown to decrease student absences.  Improved air quality by the use of green design, building materials and technologies, has been shown to lower cold and influenza by 9% to 20%, and allergies and asthma by 8% to 25%. (Indoor Environmental Department at the Lawerence Berkley National Design Laboratory in California) .

Greening your school also involves educating teachers and parents about healthy eating.  There are may reasons why it is so important to make healthier food choices as well.  Children are consuming a large number of chemicals in the foods they eat on a daily basis.  Children are more vulnerable to damage from these chemicals because they are still developing.  Pediatricians are beginning to recognize the the benefits to eating organic foods, and the AAP is weighing in on these choices as well.  Our food has changed drastically over the past 50 years, and so have digestive disorders, allergies, and many other food related issues. Many of the preservatives, food dyes, and additives that we use are banned in other countries.  The makers of GMOs are the same people who created Agent Orange and DDT.  Now they are in charge of our food supply.

Are there any risks associated with greening schools?

There are no risks associated with greening your school.  There is absolutely nothing bad that can happen as a result of participating in this program.  There are many misconceptions about going green.  One is that green cleaners are not as effective.  The disinfectants that we use are hospital grade disinfectants, proven to kill MRSA, flu, staph, salmonella, etc.  They actually have a faster kill time than bleach and Lysol.  School absences have been shown to go down when switching to green cleaners.  They do work!  Green cleaners have come a long way!  Typical green cleaners cost 30%-60% more if you purchase them on your own.  With our program, we have been able to reduce that cost to make them comparable to standard cleaners.  We have been able to keep the cost neutral for all of our certified green schools.  This is amazing!

What is the biggest obstacle to greening schools?
The biggest obstacle to overcome with this program is getting school directors to listen to what we have to say.  Many people immediately disregard what people have to say when they have preconceived ideas of what going green is all about.  We have found that school directors are a lot more open to listening to us when parents ask them to take the time to listen.  Then we need to also help the rest of the staff see the importance of what we are doing as well.  This is why we are reaching out to parents who share our passion to help us make a change. We need to help schools see that we are truly passionate about helping children and changing the future. Education is power!

Even if a school can’t commit to a whole green program, is there one change that a school can make to have a significant impact?
We make converting your school to a green school as easy as possible for the school and staff.  We provide constant support, and we are very involved in the transformation.  We want it to be as easy and stress free as possible for everyone involved, as we know that schools have enough going on!  Once the school is converted and everything is in motion, it really does become a habit, and it is a lot of fun!  We get the kids involved, and they get really ecited about being a part of protecting our planet.  I worked with kids for many years, and they have a surprising amount of passion for our planet.  We just need to talk to them about it.  If a school can’t make the full commitment to going green, the most important thing they can do is to switch out their cleaners.  They can do this with out doing the whole certification program.  This will have the most significant impact on the children’s health.

To contact Healthy Green Schools for help with your or your child’s school, you can contact Rebecca at rebecca@healthygreenschools.com

Thoughtful Thursday: Identity Crisis

We all know them – are them – have been them…the parents who post pictures of their children non-stop.  Here is an excerpt from one mama’s admission and explanation (emphasis mine):

 I share my pictures because, like every mother on the planet, I think my kids are adorable (no, but really mine *are* adorable). I share because, as pathetic as this sounds, the attention is validation of sorts. I can’t get A’s anymore — and forget about being recognized for my achievements (like getting my son to pee before leaving the house — why is this so hard?!) So what do I have? “Likes” and comments about how cute my kids are.

I share because my pictures tell stories about our daily lives and our adventures. I share because my pictures create a dialogue with other people.

And perhaps the biggest answer is that I share pictures of my kids because spending time with them is what I’m doing with my life.

Written by Jen Simon for Kveller.com – excerpt from The HuffPostBlog

While it’s a lovely and honest explanation for her behavior, I implore parents to remember who they are at their core. We owe it to ourselves, first and foremost, to preserve that identity so that we can care for others from a healthy place.

Whether you work at home or away from home, do you know who you are?  Do you know what your core values are?  Are you living them, and would your children (or anyone else) be able to name them based on your actions?

I invite all parents, whether you are at home or away during the day, to shake things up.  Who are you?  And then be honest: if you are living for your job or your children, think about changing that.  It has been my experience that remembering our “core” selves keeps us from making decisions that are harmful to our psyche.  Choices that are aligned with our values keep us from sabotaging our lives.  From here on out, I am going to continue with children as the main focus…feel free to replace that word with whatever is your major focus right now if it is not your child(ren).

Burying our value under or behind our children is at the very least, stifling, and it may only get more oppressive as time passes.  We submerge ourselves underneath our children.  We pretend that life is perfect.  We forget who we are as we talk ourselves into the idea that “this” is what we are doing with our lives.  What if “this” turns into living with regret, guilt, dwelling on lost opportunities?  These emotions may manifest themselves later, in emotions such as anger (rage), depression and other disorders.  Those things do not benefit us, or our children.  And so begins the crack in the dyke.  Unchecked, the tide of destructive behaviors ends up hurting the sweet little children we use as tools for validation from our peers.

HERE is honesty from a woman named Isabelle who was not true to herself.  This mom who “gave it all up” shares her legacy: she is not happy about her choice, and you hear regret about her life.  How many other parents feel that way?  I bet we can all think of someone.  What it is like to hear that raising children was not worthwhile, and that the lost time can’t be replaced?  They are loved, albeit in an interesting way, that is for sure.

I admire Isabelle’s commitment to raise the children she agreed to bring into the world.  She saw her role as personally giving them the best start.  That is a noble commitment, to parent out of a moral obligation to do well by them.  In addition to that, I strive to parent our children with love and respect.

As part of parenting them with love and respect, I want to honor them as their own people, separate from me.  I saw myself turning into “that” mom who over-shared.  I made a conscious choice that I had to have an identity outside of my children because I have worth apart from them, and they have worth apart from me.

While I treasure the time with our children, I have come to realize that spending time with them is not what I am doing with my life.  I am living to nurture children who can become compassionate, creative, critical thinkers.  My commitment is to create a learning environment for them, not being validated by them. My life is also fostering a setting that inspires me to be better, do more and grow so that I can be the best parent I can be for my children.  I want to meet them where they are.  I can only see with clarity if my own lens  isn’t being smudged or filtered with buried regrets or resentments of all the things I am not doing because I “have to” take care of them.

I would like to think that those of us who parent with good intentions want their children to be happy and successful.  For myself I wonder, how do I teach them to create their own happiness, value themselves, their autonomy, and their personhood if mine is non-existent?  I propose that we need to actually be happy, not just pretend to be happy in cropped and filtered social media snapshots of “perfection” that garner “likes”.

I encourage parents who find their identity and seek validation from their adorable children to take a minute to reflect.  Why is that important to you?  Can we find *you* on your social media, or just your children?  Aren’t you worth remembering?  Are you doing something to be proud of outside of your children?  If not, consider digging around to find out where you went.  If you want your children to be strong and independent, show them how to be autonomous.  If you want them growing up with a healthy respect for humanity, show them a human worth respecting for their individual value.

It is possible to be a good parent without losing yourself in your child.  It is possible to have social media accounts that are not covered with pictures of your child.  If you have an extended family stretched around the world, maybe you could consider a “secret” group (facebook) or a private blog or webpage that is password restricted.  That way you can keep a private online record for family to follow without compromising your child’s right to create their own persona.

Beyond that, you are worth it.  You deserve to find your passion and live life to the fullest, with children that make the living even more enjoyable because you have wonderful souls to share and journey with as you live.

A little postscript from the woman who decided to run a contest to increase submissions for wordless wednesday…feeling slightly hypocritical…still, food for thought:

I want my children to learn that they have a voice, and I want them to have the freedom to create their own identity.  I came to the realization that if I post pictures of them from the time they are born until the time when they are no longer living under our roof, I have created their public persona.

We are starting to hear that schools and employers ask for access to a potential employee’s social media accounts.  We know that technology can identify faces electronically.  That means that in the future, anyone can form an opinion about them based on my portrayal of their person.  That frightens me, and it is also sobering.  They deserve to define themselves.  It is their right, not mine.

Personally, I make every effort to only post pictures that are in side or back profile.  If there is one especially amazing photo that shows their full face, I ask permission before sharing.  And if they say, “NO!” or “no”, then I do not post them.  I have recently taken that position with the #wordlesswednesday submissions – if multiple photos are submitted, I will choose the images that demonstrate the theme and reveal the minimal amount of the child’s identity.  It will certainly make me think twice about the themes I choose going forward.  While I believe that images help normalize attachment parenting, the tricky part is that breastfeeding and AP necessarily involve a minor.  Hmmm.

Happy Holidays

First of all, let me start by wishing you a very happy holiday.  This year has been an adventure for us, including the decision to start a new blog.  We appreciate all of you who are reading, commenting, and sharing your journey with us, and allowing us to share with you.  You inspire us to do more and to be better.  Life on the green path is not always easy, it sure is worth it, though!!

We may be posting sporadically over the next two weeks.  Our husbands are going to be off of work, so we will be spending most of our time with them and our kiddos, instead of on the computer.  We will be posting pics over on Instagram, please feel free to follow @sweetpeafamilies and see how we are spending our holidays.  You can also follow us on twitter (I tweet early in the am before the Sweet Peas are awake) if you want to see green living – family related info we share.  Our twitter handle is @SweetPeaFams

I want to close out this year’s “official” posts with these tips to stay safe over the holiday season.  Here is an excerpt from an article entitled, “Be aware of latest product safety measures, recalls when shopping for toys, AG advises”:

According to the Consumer Product Safety Commission’s, there were an estimated 265,000 toy-related injuries treated in U.S. hospital emergency rooms in 2012. Of those injured, more than 70 percent were children younger than 15 years of age. [emphasis mine]

You can read the whole article at KyForward.com http://bit.ly/1c7DEmV.  The article lists several recently recalled children’s items, including a lamp that was sold at IKEA from 1999-2013.

And here is a safety list from Cincinnati Children’s Hospital:

Doctors at the Comprehensive Children’s Injury Center at Cincinnati Children’s and theAmerican Academy of Pediatrics give the following tips on toy safety this holiday season:

  • Parents are encouraged to read all warning labels carefully before purchasing any item.
  • Consider a child’s age, interests, and skill levels when purchasing toys.
  • Look for toys with sturdy construction and avoid items with sharp edges and points.
  • Choking is one of the leading causes of toy-related death. Most of these deaths are attributed to toy balls, latex balloons and small magnets.
  • Small items can be risky for young children. For children under age three, choose toys that are at least 1 inch in diameter and 2 inches long, so they will not lodge in a child’s mouth or throat.
  • Beware of toy jewelry that may contain lead or cadmium. Both substances can be harmful to children who put items containing these chemicals into their mouths.
  • To prevent both burns and electrical shocks, don’t give young children (under age 10) a toy that must be plugged into an electrical outlet. Instead, buy toys that are battery-operated.
  • Watch for pull toys with strings that are more than 12 inches in length. They could be a strangulation hazard for babies.
  • Parents should store toys in a designated location, such as on a shelf or in a toy chest, and keep older kids’ toys away from young children.
  • Be extra cautious about toys that are handed down from friends and relatives that may not have warning labels. Inspect these toys carefully and use your best judgment.
  • Be careful with button batteries found in toys. If ingested they can become lodged in the esophagus causing serious injury and even death.
  • High power magnets can be found in some toys and if a child ingests more than one they can attract to one another and result in serious injury or even death. Seek medical attention if your child ingests one or more magnets.
  • Once the gifts are opened, it’s important to quickly discard plastic wrapping.

Read the whole article, Toy Safety Advice for Children During the Holidays at The Global Dispatch http://bit.ly/1jq8jBu

Remember the little tip that anything that fits through an empty toilet paper tube is a choking hazard.  Also be aware of staples, plastic fasteners, and stiff paper – all can scratch, puncture or cut your child.  We run the vacuum early and often when we are all together!

One last reminder that they don’t mention in either article: be sure to watch your children in the kitchen.  We have a “no play” expectation in our home.  They know that the kitchen is “HOT”, and that they need to walk and move slowly when they are in there.  We encourage you to designate someone in the group as the “kiddo wrangler”, and make sure that the Sweet Peas are clear while the stove is on, and the oven is opening and closing.  Make sure all knife handles are out of reach, and that there is nothing dangling on the edges that they will be curious about, or try to use to pull themselves up.

That being said, enjoy the holiday season with your Sweet Peas!  We will definitely be kicking off the New Year with a Holiday Wordless Wednesday – take your fun pics, and send your shares to sweetpeafamilies{at}gmail{dot}com.

Do you have any holiday safety tips to share?

 

Real Life With Baby: First Christmas

This idea was shared by one of our Fall 2012 Sweet Pea Births alumni students.  Her son is now nine months old and starting to pull up on objects.  This blockade would be ideal for a pre-walker or pre-climber.

Here are her three easy steps to a baby-proof Christmas tree…

Christmas Box Blockade:

1.) All I did was take large rocks or cinder blocks and put them in heavy-duty boxes. Produce boxes or boxes gallons of water come in work well – they are double walled.

Double-wall means:
BLOG cbb.1 box

This is what she used:
BLOG ccb.3 cinderblock BLOG cbb.2 box
2.) I taped up the box with packing tape and wrapped them in foil paper so it wouldn’t tear, and I wouldn’t have to rewrap them!

3.) I placed them around the bottom of the tree and voila! Instant baby fence.

BLOG cbb.4 madden.2If your kiddo is already climbing, this may not be what you want next to your Christmas tree.  This collection of grounded boxes provides them with a perfect wall to climb…not a bad thing – just probably not something you want next to your treasured holiday decorations.

What are your holiday baby-proofing tips?

International Babywearing Week 2013

It’s International Babywearing Week!  Time to have carrier envy over here!!  There is just no possible way to have one of every beautiful carrier we saw at MommyCon yesterday…O My Gosh!  Talk about incredible and eye candy…awesome products by awesome people!!

If you are in the Phoenix area, be sure to check out our Upcoming Events list on Sweet Pea Births this week – Babywearing International of Phoenix has events planned all week long.  The Sweet Pea group donated logo wear and an autographed copy of Natural Childbirth Exercises by Rhondda Hartman, RN for The Main Event! raffle…hope to see you there!

Why do you babywear??